Hey there! I’m Robert. Welcome to a free edition of my newsletter. Every week, I share my story of bootstrapping my startup in AI, Alignment, and Longevity. I’m documenting my journey to become my best self—and helping humanity do the same to survive and thrive in the age of AI.These newsletters include my reflections on the journey, and topics such as entrepreneurship, startups, growth, leadership, communication, product, and more. Subscribe today to become the person and leader that people love, respect, and follow.
I used to fill every hour with noise, people, or productivity—anything to avoid being alone with myself.
I convinced myself that I was ambitious and outgoing.
I am, but that’s not all I am.
It took me years to realize that “ambition” and “outgoing” were just excuses.
New cities, new people, new projects—I loved the chase.
Or so I thought.
But whenever I slowed down, a quiet dread would creep in.
The kind of feeling you can’t explain to your coworkers or even your closest friends.
Silence used to feel like a threat. Existential dread crept in around the corners of my mind.
The loud voices around me kept the loud voices inside me quieter.
Like the truth might whisper something I didn’t want to hear.
The real truth?
I wasn’t happy with myself. In fact, I hated myself before I started therapy.
And if I stayed still too long in that silence, I had to feel that.
And I hated that too.
It wasn’t until I did the opposite—leaned into stillness, silence, and solitude—that things began to change.
Now, I love myself. I love who I am. I don’t compare myself to others.
And I’m accepting and kind to myself.
I’ve managed to change the loudness of my inner critic into the voice of my best friend.
I’ve become my own best friend.
This week, we’re diving into one of the most uncomfortable and transformative practices of Self-Alignment: Staring at your demons until they become angels.
This Week's ABC…
Advice: How To Make Your Demons Angels
Breakthrough: 5 Quotes By Bruce Lee
Challenge: Pick A Shadow
📖 Advice: How To Make Your Demons Angels
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” — Carl Jung
There are parts of you you’ve cast away.
They remain exiled.
Your inner child’s wounds.
You know the ones.
The parts of yourself you hide because of bad to traumatic experiences from role models, peers, or others that elicited such shame and fear for…
Being yourself.
The old wounds you buried under busyness, success, and smart strategy decks.
Here’s the uncomfortable truth: what you suppress, controls you.
What you integrate, empowers you.
That is what I’ve learned in my journey from poor college student to Chief Product Architect, and Startup Founder with patented work.
To build real influence as a leader—and most importantly, a leader of yourself—you need to put down the self-help books and podcasts.
You need to do the real work.
You need more of YOU—the full, integrated, emotionally aware you.
It took me years to realize I didn’t actually enjoy EVERY new experience or person I met.
I just enjoyed them more than the discomfort of the experience of being with myself.
When I finally stopped chasing, I met the parts of me I was running from.
I call him Little Robert, a name my therapist coined for me.
Little Robert is the one that loves reading, writing poetry, drawing, painting, designing—all the things I first fell in love with as a kid.
I cast him away when I was poor as shit in college trying to make ends meet and get to a point of stability.
And now I have him back, and now I feel whole.
Shoutout to my therapist.
So how do you do “the real work”?
Here’s a process to do shadow work that I’ve found tremendously useful. I wish I learned it ages ago.
It’s the 3-2-1 process I learned from Ken Wilber’s work.
Ken Wilber’s 3-2-1 Process is one of the most powerful ways I’ve found to face those inner demons—and turn them into allies.
Let’s break it down.
Step 0: First… Block Off Time To Sit With Yourself
This is the most important part. Because we all have busy, chaotic lives.
If you don’t block off time to be alone and actually do the work, you won’t do it.
You’ll keep running.
So…
Stop running. Literally. Sit.
No phone. No music. No self-help books.
Just you and the uncomfortable silence.
You’ll want to escape.
The pull to doomscroll will feel strong.
The pull to check your emails or Slack messages will feel strong.
You’ll justify it with “productivity”.
But stay. Be stronger than your base desires.
You have agency and control, don’t you?
Immerse yourself in the noise, and you will find signal and clarity in yourself.
I recommend just focusing on your breath.
Then…
Step 1: Face It (Third Person)
Start by identifying the thing that triggers you.
Someone who makes your skin crawl.
A memory that still stings.
A quality you can’t stand in others.
Now, describe it as if you’re talking about someone else.
“He’s arrogant.”
“She’s fake.”
“They never listen.”
This is called taking the third-person perspective—or “facing it.”
The goal here isn’t to judge.
It’s to bring what’s unconscious into the light.
When you name it, you separate you from it.
You create enough space to observe without being consumed.
Step 2: Talk to It (Second Person)
Next, shift your relationship to it. Instead of describing the shadow, talk to it.
“Why are you like this?”
“What are you afraid of?”
“What do you want me to know?”
And the powerful question I ask: “Why are you here?”
This is the second-person perspective—the dialogue.
Talk to your shadow. Bad feelings don’t just exist, they belong to you. You manifest them.
So talk to them. Understand them.
When you stop fighting your shadow and start listening, you realize every part of you had a reason to exist.
Even the ugly ones.
The anger was protecting you.
The anxiety was trying to keep you safe.
The envy was pointing toward a part of you that’s hungry to grow.
When you unroot the why, you paint a better picture of who you are.
You must be honest with yourself. Don’t lie to yourself. Be brutally honest.
If you lie, you will continue feeling discontent with who you are.
This is where compassion enters the picture.
Step 3: Be It (First Person)
Now comes the real integration work.
Speak as the shadow. These are your demons. This is how they become angels.
“I am angry, because...”
“I am jealous, because…”
“I crave control, because…”
This is the first-person perspective—“being it.”
It’s the hardest and most liberating step.
When you own what you’ve been running from, it loses its grip on you.
You reclaim the energy it once held hostage.
That’s why Wilber calls it “gold star” work.
Inside every demon is really just buried power, passion, confidence, authenticity.
I’ve learned that what we label “dark” is often just light we’ve refused to look at.
Putting It All Together
So here’s the process flow:
Face it → Talk to it → Be it → Integrate it → Free yourself.
Note: This isn’t a one-time exercise.
It’s a lifelong practice of Self-Alignment.
You build up what I call “shadow debt” whenever you are emotionally triggered/flooded.
Every time you get triggered, you’re being invited to meet another part of yourself that wants to come home to you.
When you learn to stare at your demons long enough, you stop fearing them.
You start seeing their wings.
That’s how you turn your demons into angels.
Takeaway: You don’t need to slay your demons. You need to understand them, sit with them, and give them a new job—being your angels.
🚀 Breakthrough: 5 Quotes By Bruce Lee
One of most powerful realizations I had growing up is realizing nobody knows what they’re doing.
Not even the “grown ups”.
Everybody is figuring their shit out.
So are you, so am I.
And that’s just fine.
We are all on our own respective journeys to find ourselves, and live a healthy and content life full of love, belonging, and purpose.
That much, we all have in common.
What I’ve learned is: the path to a harmonious life is continuous.
I’ve additionally realized through trial and error that there is no one tool that is perfect.
Every situation requires adaptation from the individual and is context dependent.
For this, I borrow heavily in my Self-Alignment philosophy from Bruce Lee’s own philosophies.
Quotes are great mental tools.
They serve as reminders, and can create inspiration, and motivation.
Here are some of my favorite quotes from Bruce Lee for this week’s Breakthrough.
“Absorb what is useful, discard what is not, and add what is uniquely your own”
“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.”
“Do not pray for an easy life. Pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.”
“Knowing is not enough, we must apply. Willing is not enough, we must do.”
“There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.”
His philosophies encourage constant evolution, open-mindedness, and a focus on practicality over tradition, emphasizing fluidly adapting to any situation.
You must align yourself to the situation or task at hand, the smaller stepping stones to your best self.
What Did I Do This Week?
This week is SF Tech week! TONS of connection and learnings.
There was a morning bike ride from the Marina to Hawk Hill hosted by my friends at Delphi.
I decided to run it instead, and catch the sunrise from the top.
It was about 13 miles.
I made some content while running too, so I hit multiple birds with one stone! I was coming down the hill by 6:30 AM.
By the time I was done, I had already shipped new designs, content, and got my workout in. And I was ready to connect with other founders and investors.
Remember: there are no limits—only plateaus.
💥 Challenge: Pick A Shadow
Pick a shadow you have.
Use the 3-2-1 method.
Get after it.
You got this.
Your future self will thank you.
Liked this article?
💚 Click the like button.
Feedback or addition?
💬 Add a comment.
Know someone that would find this helpful?
🔁 Share this post.
P.S. If you haven’t already checked out my other newsletter, ABCs for Building The Future, where I reflect on my founder’s journey building a venture in the open. Check out my learnings on product, leadership, entrepreneurship, and more—in real time!
P.S.S. Want reminders on entrepreneurship, growth, leadership, empathy, and product?
Follow me on..